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[11 Jun 2013|10:45pm]
This world can be a dark fuckin place, you know?
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[10 May 2013|03:49pm]
I took your pictures down to forget where I came from. The empty space they left reminds me. A strand of hair, a bobby pin left on the table; the subtle things I can never seem to cleanse. But I will stay here, and I will be the one shit on for these past five years, and I won't say a word; I'll let you be the martyr, but when you fuck this up, don't assume that you'll have my sympathy. Now I drink just to get drunk, not for the taste like I used to say. It ain't easier when you're on your own. I keep thinking that someday, we'll wake up and we'll be okay. Sometimes the hope's what hurts you the most. Still I will stay here, and I'll be the one shit on for these past five years, and I won't say a word; I'll let you be the martyr, but when you fuck this up, don't assume that you'll have anything. I won't say all those things that I should have said before, because you can't go back again. Sometimes people do some things that you just can't take back, so rebuild, burn, or walk away.
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When my life falls apart, I write new songs [21 Mar 2013|07:16pm]
I wake up shaking more often than not. Room spinning, head pounding, mouth cotton, stomach in knots. You'd think I'd be tired of living this way; the truth is I would be, if this was any kind of life, if I had any kind of say. So meet me round the back, by the porch tonight. If you keep track, we'll make it through the night. And I know you said, "No, never again." But maybe just this once, can we just pretend? Maybe we'll fall in love again.
You could say things have gotten worse since I took the easy way out. But that's the thing about running away; the worse that things get, the less that you notice it. And yeah, sure, I miss the way things were from time to time; but I've lived long enough to know that life ain't a circle. It's a straight fucking line. So meet me round the back, by the porch tonight. If you keep track, we'll make it through the night. And I know you said, "No, never again." But maybe just this once, can we just pretend?
Meet me round the back, eight o'clock tonight. Cover up your track marks, I know a guy. And I know you said, "No, never again." But he said he'd hook us up, so tell me, are you in? Maybe we'll fall in love again.
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[11 Sep 2011|08:57pm]
Something I've been meaning to tell you
'Bout three years and a day
I'd very much like to get married
Maybe have kids and move away
Cause there ain't nothing like your smile
Your legs and those eyes
And I will beg and steal and borrow
To keep you safe your whole life
And I don't mind
If we take our time
Cause I'm all yours
And you're all mine

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Joke of the day [15 Aug 2010|02:10pm]
A man walks into a bar. He gets so drunk that he vomits all over his own shirt. He says to the bartender, "What am I going to do? My wife will kill me when she sees that I got this drunk."
The bartender says, "Don't worry about it, here's what you do: put a ten dollar bill in your shirt pocket, and tell her that some other guy got drunk and threw up on your shirt, and gave you the money to pay to get it cleaned."
So the man goes home, and says to his wife, "Some guy at the bar got really drunk and threw up on my shirt, but he gave me this ten dollar bill to pay to get it cleaned."
His wife says, "But that's a twenty dollar bill."
The man says, "Oh, I forgot to tell you, he shit in my pants too."

-Gilbert Gottfried
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[05 Jul 2010|03:10pm]
"This stuff will make you a goddamn sexual Tyrannosaurus, just like me."
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[12 Apr 2010|12:34am]
"Want to hear something funny?
When I was...gone...I met a man who was obsessed with driving a car around the world in one day. He swore up and down he could do it, and he tried to, many times, from what I understand.
At the end of those failed days...he'd sit on the side of the road, cursing his bad luck.

Eventually, a good samaritan would stop.
After slaughtering the samaritan- and anyone else with the samaritan, like his wife, children- he'd put them in his car, set it on fire, and drive off in theirs.
Then he'd fill up the tank and wait on the sun, so he could try to drive to drive around the world again.

The point is, he blamed the CARS for his failures. It never crossed his mind that what he believed he could do was impossible.

I admire that.
I really do."
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[21 Mar 2010|03:45pm]
I made a facebook. Add it or something.
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[19 Mar 2010|08:48pm]
Goddamn... the new Four Year Strong CD kicks fucking ass. Seriously.
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Check this out [17 Mar 2010|03:26pm]

Absolutely stunning animation and the Gorillaz in a high speed car chase/shoot-out with my personal hero, the always-badass Bruce Willis. Can a music video possibly be any more awesome? I submit to you that it cannot.

Oh yeah, the song is good too.
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[11 Mar 2010|04:41pm]
New post on Pop Culture Nightmare. I spent a few weeks on it, and I'm pretty happy with how it turned out. And it's about music, so you're more likely to find it entertaining. "Top 5 songs to cheer you up".


Do it up.
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Still one of my favorites [09 Mar 2010|01:32pm]
Let's call this the quiet city:
Where screams are felt as a wave of stoplights
Drive through the streets as gunshots punctuate the night
The sides we take divide us from our faith
And the morning dove gets caught in the telephone wire

Asleep, you set the fire in your own house
And the night was a knife that cut
And I'm paralyzed
Cross out the eyes
Blur all the lines
Tear this canvas from the wall
Cross out the eyes
Put lines through these cries
We tore all the leaves from the trees that fall

The silent dance that we did into this hospital bed
Hear voices from another room:
"It happens all the time"
But July in the sand, the leaves falling
We're counting down our days to live
Drain the blood from this valentine

"We can rise
On the wings of the dove
See blue skies getting caught in the trail of all this smoke
We can rise
Like candles in the dark
Yours always," and an envelope marked with your new address

It was the first time face to face
I'm crossing the line, talking to the other side of death
Hearing the words that choke memories into flatlines
Calling your name, hoping for something to wash these dreams of you away

Our fence was blown down in a winter storm
And this field stretches out of this world into the sound
What can we do to put a stop to the coming white days?
I'm hoping the snow will wash these dreams of you away

Stretches out of this world
Let's drive back the dead
Stretches out of this world
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[06 Mar 2010|01:42pm]

Brilliant. Just...just brilliant.
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Promo 2 [25 Feb 2010|06:25pm]
I started a humorous blog recently, and I just wrote a new entry today. Go check it out, and if you like it, tell your friends to read it!!

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[17 Feb 2010|01:49am]


If you know me, you know my dream is to make a living being a writer, specifically a comedy writer. My blog that I just started is my first step toward this goal. I'm just getting started, but please support me by taking five minutes to read it and let me know what you think.
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[13 Feb 2010|04:38pm]
I started a blog, it's at npawlows.blogspot.com. Go check it out.
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Two types of people that piss me off in college [11 Feb 2010|04:12pm]
1. The kid who feels the need to question the professor at every turn. This guy won't allow the professor to get through the lecture, because he has to raise his hand to interrupt with what he thinks are deep insights or pressing questions after every sentence. I shit you not, this is an excerpt of what happened during my developmental psychology lecture today:

PROF: So I want you all to imagine that you're the CEO of a hospital, and you have to decide if Neonatal Behavioral Assessment Scale training is worth investing money in-
DUMBASS: Well what's the bottom line for the hospital?
PROF: Uh... huh?
DUMBASS: I mean, how much money total do you have to allocate to different areas? Are there other areas, such as equipment upkeep, that may be more pressing?
PROF: I...I don't know, I'm just saying, try to think like a psychologist and look at the evidence presented by studies done on the effectiveness of NBAS training as it relates to parenting ability-
DUMBASS: Well, if you're the CEO you could technically charge the parents for the training, and even if it doesn't work, you would make even more money later theoretically by charging them again for further therapy.
PROF: ...Jesus Christ. I just meant-
DUMBASS: I'm just saying, it makes fiscal sense either way.

...And it went on like this for another hour and a half. Hey idiot, YOU'RE MISSING THE ENTIRE FUCKING POINT. This ain't a business class, it's a psychology course. You succeeded in pointing out that the professor's scenario wasn't entirely bulletproof, but then again, that's not what we're here to learn about, is it? Maybe if you'd let the prof finish his thought instead of jumping to try to prove that you're smarter than him, even you could figure that out.
The worst part is, I understand how these people think, because I'm guilty of it myself sometimes. They think that their intellect is so vastly superior to the rest of us that they're actually doing us a favor by gracing us with their knowledge. They think the rest of us are mesmerized by their genius, and we're thinking to ourselves, "Man that guy's smart. Why isn't he teaching the class? He knows more than the professor!" I'll admit, sometimes I get the feeling that I'm surrounded by a bunch of drooling retards, and that they could all learn something from me. The difference is, I have the common decency to KEEP MY FUCKING TRAP SHUT, because I recognize that not only am I most likely wrong in that assumption, but also that I as well as everyone else in the class paid to learn from my professor- a man who has spent more years of his life working in this field than not- and not some second-year asshole in the first row. If you really know more than the professor, do us all a favor and drop out and conduct your own studies, and then promptly get laughed out of the scientific community faster than people who "don't believe in evolution" (another group of dumbshits that piss me off, but that's another subject entirely).
We don't think you're smart, and we aren't amazed by your rambling and often erroneous insights. Mostly we're just pissed off that you're robbing us of the education we could be getting without you making us more stupid. If you really want to show off how smart you are while being a complete dickhead, that's what the internet is for. Well, that and titties.

2. The people who talk/look at facebook during class. I first encountered this my very first semester of my freshman year, and it's never ceased to baffle me. Sure, in the classes that are set up in huge lecture halls, you can get away with talking and not paying attention during class. But...why would you do that? Hey fucktard, you're PAYING to be here. Paying out the ass. And I don't really care about that; if you like to waste money, fine. What I do care about however is the fact that I am paying out the ass to be here as well, and your inane chatter is drowning out the professor.
Facebook is even worse, because believe it or not, when you're on your laptop in the row in front of me looking at your hot girl friend's "LyKe OMG CaLi TrIp!!!!1" album, wherein she's mostly wearing a thong and not much more, then yeah, it's fucking distracting. It's a little hard to listen to my ex-Social Distortion fanclub president professor drone on and on about mitochondrion and leukoplasts when you're looking at titties right in front of me. And while titties are infinitely more interesting than cellular structure, I'd kinda like to pass the exam, which oh by the way is FUCKING TOMORROW! And some of us (me) are set to graduate at the end of this semester, which of course is entirely contingent upon me passing this class. So if you could maybe be respectful and look at titties on your own time like I do, that would just be super.
I swear to God. The bottom line: if you're going to talk or waste your time on facebook and not pay attention during class, then...why even come to class at all? Seriously, you aren't getting anything out of it, and thanks to you, neither am I. Hell, why even go to college?

Fucking idiots.
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Because I'm bored [06 Feb 2010|02:18pm]
Music I can't stop listening to lately:

The American Analog Set- Promise of Love. It's so good. It's like all the good parts of mid-90's emo bands but with a slightly more modern polish.

Faunts- Feel Love Thinking Of. Think The Smiths meets The Cure meets The Album Leaf. Or think I'm crazy. Either way, Faunts make great chill electro new-wave that's great to have playing in the background while you're fuckin', or just while you're driving around late at night.

The Gaslight Anthem- The '59 Sound. I don't know why it took me so long to get around to listening to this album, but it's fucking great. When bands put the word "anthem" in their names, they rarely live up to the title, but these guys do. Plus they sound like a more punk Bruce Springsteen, an observation which I'm well aware has been made many times by many other people, so I'm just gonna move on now.

The Meeting Places- Find Yourself Along the Way. Call it shoegaze, call it dream pop, I just call it good. Most bands in this genre have a tendency to create walls of noise that make you feel like you're drowning underwater for the duration of the album, but when it's over you can't remember a single distinguishable moment (at least in my opinion). I love this kind of music when it's done well, which is rare; but these guys definitely do it well. Their newer release is pretty good too, but I much prefer this one.

New Found Glory- Not Without a Fight. So fucking sue me. I have a theory about Blink 182, and I think it now may apply to NFG as well: No matter who you are or what kind of music you listen to, you secretly like Blink/NFG. After all, how could you not? NFG kind of started to fade away for awhile, but this CD takes them back to what they're good at: straight-forward, catchy-as-hell pop punk with a twist of hardcore flavor mixed in. I find it inspiring that two bands that I used to absolutely love when I was younger- New Found Glory and Thursday- can put out records that are quite possibly their best this late into their careers. (Side note: if you haven't checked out Thursday's Common Existence yet, do that too.)

Placebo- Sleeping With Ghosts. When this CD first came out years and years ago, I remember reading so many praises for it everywhere that when I finally listened to it and it didn't wow me within its first 30 seconds, I wrote it off as another Brit-rock band that was completely overrated. How wrong I was. Revisiting it now, I can't stop listening to it. I haven't been this hooked on a CD since Passion Pit's "Manners" (or Owl City's "Ocean Eyes"...fuck you, it may be a guilty pleasure, but it's still a pleasure), though Placebo sounds nothing like that. It's just...just fucking go listen to it.

William Elliott Whitmore- Animals in the Dark. A skinny white kid with the voice of a grizzled 70 year old black bluesman with a two pack a day habit and a penchant for drinking whiskey straight. Of course I love it. "Hell or High Water" is the ultimate bar singalong. Everyone needs to learn the words to that song, because I'm gonna bust out the acoustic next time we're all hanging out getting drunk, and we're gonna sing it loud.
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Writer's Block: Copy that [29 Jan 2010|04:19pm]
How do you feel about human cloning? Do you think the long-term societal impact will be positive or negative? Why?

How is this even a debate?! Hasn't anyone seen the classic American film "The Sixth Day" with Arnold Swarzeneggar?! According to science, the future will be exactly like that if human cloning is allowed to take place. In other words, it'll be awesome.
Also, we'll be able to cure all sorts of diseases and shit, or whatever and stuff. Look, all that matters is that you'll be able to run around snapping people's necks with reckless abandon, because anyone that dies can just be cloned back to life anyway. That's a world I want to live in. And remember the part where the guy had a digital holographic girlfriend that started to take off his pants somehow? If cloning humans is allowed to be explored, in the future not only will we gain a form of immortality, but HOLOGRAMS WILL GIVE US HANDJOBS SOMEHOW. Check mate, dissenters.
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[11 Jan 2010|06:32pm]
1. I absolutely can't wait for the movie "Kick-Ass" to come out. If you haven't heard of it, go watch a trailer for it, and run to your local comic store and pick up some issues. Also, oddly enough, it's the first movie with Nicolas Cage in it that I've thought looked good in a reeeeally long time.

2. If you haven't already heard, Sam Raimi walked away from Spiderman 4, and the studio dropped the entire production. Apparently, the plan is now to do a reboot of the series, replacing the entire cast (including Tobey Maguire) and sending Peter Parker back to high school. Now, the Batman franchise reboot worked out really well, but that was a series that badly needed it, and it had been quite awhile since the last movie came out. Even though Spiderman 3 was pretty shitty, it wasn't "Batman and Robin"-level shitty. The Spiderman franchise doesn't need a fucking reboot in the first place, even ignoring the fact that the memory of the last movie hasn't faded enough to make one necessary. Letting the series alone for a decade or so would be a better idea; releasing a reboot in 2012, as is the plan, is just confusing.

idk; What do you think?
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